Taking time out for recovery is key to meeting your goals, so don’t let guilt or anxiety put you off relaxing. Here are some fitness recovery tips to get you feeling well rested…

Words: Eve Boggenpoel

If you’ve ever had your Sunday rest plans derailed after scrolling though #NoDaysOff posts, you’re part of a growing tribe of women feeling the pressure to perform – in and out of the gym. When you’re training regularly while juggling work, family, domestic and social commitments, it’s easy for self-criticism to creep in if you skip a workout or take time to relax. And with the festive season approaching, the demands on our time only multiply. So why do we put rest and recovery at the bottom of our to-do list, and how can we reframe rest so that our training – and our lives – feel more sustainable and enjoyable?

‘As a clinical neuropsychologist, CEO and mom of three, I often see patients, colleagues and, frankly, myself, feeling guilty about pausing, resting or skipping a workout – especially during this time of year when expectations skyrocket,’ says Dr Kristine Keane, clinical and sports neuropsychologist at 
the Center for NeuroWellness (centerforneurowellness.com). ‘The pressure to be everything to everyone can make rest feel unrealistic, even when we’re exhausted.’

When rest feels wrong

Feeling guilty for resting is actually hardwired into our system. In simple terms, guilt arises from a sense of identity built by experience, believes life coach Roselyn Pérez Casiano (insightfulessence.com). ‘As humans, the first five-to-seven years of our lives focus on developing safety, survival and a feeling of belonging,’ she says. ‘If a child is continually praised for their accomplishments, phrases like “you’re such a good girl” can attach to their identity even before language fully develops.’ With such deeply ingrained patterns, it’s only logical that compensatory behaviours emerge. For many women, when there’s a sense of not being seen, understood or valued, the resulting vulnerability ‘can be pacified by taking care of others, achieving, performing or proving themselves worthy in various ways’, adds Roselyn. Unless we address those root causes, that vulnerability naturally resurfaces when we stop these behaviours. ‘When women pause, rest or take time out, guilt activates the survival brain, which perceives this as a threat to identity. Guilt is the nervous system’s outdated programming to restore belonging and safety,’ she says.

And it doesn’t help that your brain itself is wired to resist rest. ‘Productivity gives our brain dopamine, the “reward” chemical that says, “Do that again, it feels good”,’ explains Dr Keane. You’ve probably noticed it yourself when you tick something off your to-do list, host the perfect Christmas dinner or power through a workout when you’re exhausted – that satisfying sense of control and achievement is your brain’s reward system lighting up. ‘Over time, this becomes a neurological loop – productivity, more dopamine, then more productivity,’ says Dr Keane. ‘And because rest, recovery and self-care don’t produce the same immediate dopamine spike, your brain misinterprets rest as doing nothing – or even falling behind.’

Shift your mindset

It might feel counterintuitive, but getting adequate rest is crucial for becoming fitter, faster and more productive. While pushing through workouts day after day can feel like a fast track to results, skipping recovery time can backfire. ‘Physiologically, lack of rest elevates cortisol and inflammation, disrupts hormones, weakens the immune system, delays muscle repair and increases the risk of injury, exhaustion and burnout,’ warns Dr Keane. ‘When we constantly push without recovery, performance declines because the body and brain cannot fire efficiently under chronic stress. Conversely, when we’re rested, our energy, endurance, co-ordination and reaction time improve. Rest prevents plateaus and helps the nervous system perform at its best.’

And it’s not just your fitness goals that suffer. Not prioritising rest and recovery can undermine your mental performance, creativity and alignment with your goals. ‘Mentally, chronic overproduction leads to brain fog, irritability, anxiety, reduced focus, emotional reactivity and loss of motivation,’ says Dr Keane. ‘Many women blame themselves for lack of discipline when, in reality, their brain and nervous system are depleted.’ And, over time, constantly pushing yourself can impair sleep and motivation, while balancing exertion with rest supports emotional stability, focus and sustained motivation.

Rethink your time off

Schedule rest with the same priority as meetings – One of the most powerful tools for recovery is putting rest on your calendar just like a meeting or appointment. In theory, this makes it non-negotiable, but be careful not to override it the moment someone else needs something or a task feels more important.

‘The real shift isn’t just scheduling rest, it’s honouring it with the same boundaries, urgency and respect that we give to everyone else’s needs. Rest must be treated as essential, not optional,’ says Dr Keane.

Try practising self-compassion – If needed, start gently by reminding yourself that rest is critical for your ability to show up for yourself and for others. ‘Set boundaries to protect your time and find ways to value your own needs which, in turn, will allow you to be more present, balanced and resilient,’ suggests Roselyn.

Practise affirmations – Anindita Bhaumik, certified clinical trauma professional at Boston Evening Therapy Associates (bostoneveningtherapy.com) suggests women who struggle with overperforming try reframing their beliefs around rest by using the following phrases:

  • Needing rest is not a moral failure.
  • When I rest, I’m the best version of myself.
  • I can only achieve my fitness goals with sufficient rest.
  • Rest isn’t counter to productivity – it’s the key to it.
  • Rest doesn’t hold me back from my potential – it helps me reach it.

When you start treating rest as fuel rather than failure, everything changes – your health, fitness, emotional wellbeing and ability to show up for the people and goals that matter. During the festive season, the pressure to do it all peaks, but so does the opportunity to rewrite your to do-list and move rest to the top. As Dr Keane says, ‘There’s one thing neuroscience, performance research and real life all agree on: ‘Rest is not the reward for having done enough. It’s the requirement for becoming who you are capable of being.’

Hack your rest

Whether you’re struggling to sleep or finding it hard to relax, these smart tools will help your body make the most of recovery:

Personalise your pillow: If you’re not sleeping well, your pillow could be the culprit. Research in the European Journal of Integrative Medicine found the material, shape, height and thermal properties of pillows all impact sleep quality. Try The Adjustable HoneyFoam Pillow (£99, finebedding.co.uk), with hexagonal foam clusters you can contour to create your ideal level of support.

Shut out snoring: Partner keeping you awake? Try Soundcore Sleep A30 sleep buds (£199, soundcore.com), which cut noise by 30dB. These clever buds analyse snoring frequency and play binaural-beat soundscapes to calm brainwaves. You can also stream music and track your sleep – they even glow in the box, so you can easily find them if you need to reach for them in the middle of the night!

Go screen-free: Reduce stress with the Colorgram Calming Wooden Puzzle (£19, boostology.co.uk). Based on a 2,000-year-old Greek design by Archimedes, this 14-piece jigsaw engages your brain without overstimulation, boosting creativity, memory and mindfulness. Made from sustainably sourced pine, it soothes both mind and conscience.

Soak away stress: Ease workout-weary muscles and boost sleep with Ilāpothecary Magnesium & Amethyst Deep Relax Bath Soak (£59, cultbeauty.com).
Magnesium and mineral-rich salts support sleep, while restorative amethyst soothes nerves, cedarwood promotes melatonin release and eases physical tension, and benzoin oil calms nervous tension.

Reset in style: Need a full-body reboot? Head to North London’s new wellness destination, Reset (from £25, resetsauna.com). Featuring contrast therapy, breathwork sessions, a 25-person sauna, aromatic oils and ice plunges, you can choose from expert-led classes or the community-focused Contrast Social Club – for alcohol-free socialising that restores body and mind.